Saturday, September 09, 2006

Past Due, Day 9, Friday- Managing Frustration

I finally figured out how to deal with being married and working on the house. I proudly present The Married Person’s Home Improvement Drinking Game:

Take a sip when:
  • She / He says “It looks crooked”
  • She / He says “are you sure?”
  • She / He leaves another paint goober on the wall / door
  • She / He hangs a picture up
  • She / He asks “plus or minus?” after you ask for the Phillips screwdriver
  • She / He hands you the wrong tool, and your eight year-old corrects him/her

Take a shot every time:

  • She / He moves your tools
  • She / He measures anything and says “around,” “about,” or “kinda”
  • She / He puts all the nuts, bolts and screws in one can / jar / cup
  • She / He gets upset when you ask for the dikes
  • She / He flips the switch when you are working on the lights
  • She / He says “No big deal”
  • She / He drops her end
  • She / He asks how to use the carpenter’s level (again)
  • She / He dumps all the nails in one bag (“they’re just nails”)
  • You get a dirty look

Drink directly from the bottle when:

  • She / He has to use the toilet immediately after you disconnect it
  • She / He says “That should be easy”
  • She / He looks up how to do something on the internet, then tells you (but doesn't share the print out)
  • She / He vacuums the worksite, while you are working
  • She / He unplugs the chop saw for her radio
  • She / He tells you to watch the baby while you’re running a circular saw

I’m going to need to go to meetings after this house. Oh well, at least I can be mayor.

Total costs: $2,465


At 1:18 AM, Blogger Oregon Coast said...

You don't drink enough to be mayor.

At 5:11 PM, Anonymous Jaggy said...

I love how a few of these go "when she/he... her..." lol, hilarious! If working in the shop with my dad taught me nothing else, I learned:

1. If you don't know, ask.
2. If you have to ask, you don't need to know.
3. Until you know, ask, or are told, don't touch.

At 1:13 AM, Blogger Tom said...

So, Blogger is weird. I can't post comments on other people's blogs.

I guess that is good....

At 5:43 PM, Blogger Miss Sassy said...

Phillips... "plus or minus?"

I picture big doe eyes, then a short redhead with the correct tool in her hand rolling her eyes to daddy, daddy winking with the smile back, then turning on his heel to reach for the bottle, as the "dirty look" is on the bottom of the list.

I need another vacation day(s). Want some help? =)


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