A little angry

Now, normally, I’d just quietly sit here and write about how I ran my water filter for six months, then realized I hadn’t put in the cartridge. You know, the part that actually filters the water. Works a whole lot better now.

Anyway, I’m pretty much fed up with humanity. I’m actually thinking of cheering for the Bird flu. Or maybe I’ll start a smallpox booster club. Whatever, we need to thin this herd.

A lot.

So, in no particular order:

1. I am in awe at level of disconnected constant communication that people feel they need. By wandering around with a cell phone on your head you miss more than you will ever know.
   
   Remember those tiny people in the back seat watching a DVD while you chat about what you are fucking planning to watch on TV that night to the person behind you? Yeah- they’ll be gone soon and you are going to wonder where in the hell the time went.
   
   Guess what? It went to AT&T. Hang up and talk to the little ones.
   
   I’m supposed to respond to telephones, text messages, and emails now. Simply not going to happen. I have no need to be in constant communication with people. The people who I like talk to know how I work, and if they need me, they can find me.
   
   Want to know a secret? You will get more from twenty minutes of quiet time with a friend or your family than from all the cell minutes your plan offers.
   
   By the way, I go to the Cup every Saturday morning around 9 am. I’m the big redhead with the long green coat.
   
   
2. If you have a problem with someone and can’t say it to their face, then I don’t give a shit. Never had, never will. Shove your whispered comments and snarky attitude directly up your ass. Preferably written on gas-soaked rags and lit on fire.
   
   
3. Television is not an experience! It does not happen to you! You do not “share” an experience- you passively sit there- often slack jawed- and simply stare. My life is not unusual, it is simply enjoyed. I notice and experience a thousand wonderful, nuanced things because I’m not expecting a dramatic overture or a fucking laugh track.
   
   Moreover, I don’t want to hear about “your shows.” To me, such conversation is worse than second-hand smoke. It pollutes the air and I feel as if I must protect those I love from the foul stench.
   
   
4. Face up, folks. Most of your problems are your own damn fault. Think about it. Stop blaming other people for your decisions and/or shitty luck.
   
   
5. Start getting “need” right. You need only air, shelter, water, food, and clothing. Everything else is a want and should be treated as such.
   
   
6. You probably have too many wants. Try and thin that down.
   
   
7. I’m glad you like your perfume. I’d probably like it as well, if it didn’t envelope me in a stinking cloud that would mask the smell of Warrenton when you walked by.
   
   
8. Have people over- or visit them- more often. It’s good for you.
   
   
9. There are very few emergencies in life. A real emergency ends up with the loss of a need (see number 8). Stop overreacting.
   
   
10. The vast majority of what you do is insignificant. Five years after you die, very little of what you did will be remembered. Ten years, even less. It is, however, very important to do all things well, as you will never be sure what exactly people will remember.